"Is the Australian media picking this up? I didn't do this just for the fun of it, you know."
Yrma La Douche looked a bit like a boobless wet rat when she emerged from the canal after this year's Christiansborg Rundt annual swim event over the weekend, but props where they are due: she completed a 2 kilometre open-water swim in about 35 minutes. Nice endeavor and impressive time! But as with most things Derfie's MoreMore does, it falls flat. Mary trained in advance and recruited about the best person in Denmark to help her and escort her through the water - Danish Olympian Mette Jacobsen - then called the press to make sure her efforts were recorded for posterity - and publication.
There's no knocking the sheer athleticism of Mary's achievement. Even with the best assistance, she powered herself through each lap (those banged up feet of hers might even offer a "fin effect"). But how can she howl against cynicism when it was reported that this was an "anonymous" effort when she came with full makeup (joizuz! is her eyeliner tattooed on!?), an Olympian buddy, and a cameraman? But not only that, there are endless articles in generally safe (but not always, mwoah) BT, about how Mary was a competitive swimmer in the past. Oh, f*ck me. The re-write of Mary's life continues. You really must be embarrassed by your own life story, Yrma.
What did the Olympics do to her? She has to have the same publicity as the world's elite athletes? Mares, put this kind of effort into your charities and show better effort with your Danish language skills, and people might actually cut you some slack, you narcissistic fool. As long as your mug is in the Aussie media, and your are praised for "Sporty Mary" stunts, you don't really give a crap, do you? Oh, and you better the hell have paid Mette for her time and energy, but I wouldn't count on it. Yrma glides along on the system that says, the little people of Denmark will do anything in service to their royals. Uglier than a boobless wet rat.
At least poor Tanja didn't have to swim behind her wearing her blue "on duty" M ribbon pin, holding a bouquet of flowers and Madam's pricey purse! Now we know why Caroline moved to London!
Swim Legend Trained Crown Princess Mary
Over the weekend, Mary went through with a swim tour for the 2012 Christiansborg Round. The training took place in secret with the former elite swimmer Mette Jacobsen - and it was important for the float of preparing Crown Princess on the conditions during the swim.
To get Mary used to swimming in 'real' water between undercurrent, seaweed and sea grass, Mette Jacobsen took the Crown Princess out to swim in Furesøen and in the Øresund.
"It is very good to have tried to swim in open water. Because you can be a little surprised at the things that are in the water, and that there is water where you can not actually see very much, says the experienced swimmer."
And although swim on Saturday certainly was not Mary's first, she has participated in competitions in his school, it was Mette Jacobsen still impressed with his royal pupil.
"She swims a really nice crawl. I'm looking - of course - a little at her technique along the way, but generally she swims really nicely. It was also a nice time, 35 minutes, because we had a goal of 40 minutes", says the professional swimmer who also praises both Frederik and Mary to be some good role models when it comes to moving.
"It's nice that you can do such a thing in Denmark, without getting into hysteria, and that Mary may be allowed to participate in it, without it being expected to do something big."
Mette Jacobsen received a call from Mary during the Olympics. Mary told the swimmer that she had set herself a challenge of undertaking the 2012 Christiansborg Round, but no one could know about it in advance.
"She asked me if I would like to train with her and swim the round with her so she could feel safe and get through it. It seemed like it could be really fun", says Mette Jacobsen.
Photos: Keld Navntoft/Kongehuset