Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Prince Felix and His Mum Get Thrown a UNICEF Crumb and Enjoy a Photographic Display With a Cuppa

Oh, the contrast between the Schackenborg lovelies and the royal bogan children is just too delicious! And you have to love Alexandra for her innocent but inescapable revelations about the Schackenborg princes' upbringing versus that of the tragic brood at the psychodelic palace (we'll have a private discussion about her tragic highlights later). Prince Felix accompanied his mother Countess Alexandra to a UNICEF event (the patronage that Yrma takes over when William and Kate come to town, or when she and her point-and-shoot can make a little artistic holiday in Africa) to celebrate a true photographer's work in the Central African Republic and celebrate the launch of a water purification tablet. Art and substance! Not empty posing and preening!
Alex's unintentional subliminal smack down of the Boganson kiddos is aided by Her og Nu's writer who gushes about Felix's lovely manners and self-control. No pulling faces here! No digging for boogers! No spazzing out or stimming! By contrast, we have here a real budding interest in the artistic offerings! A polite young man who gamely participated in the day's life-changing offerings to people across the world who require access to clean water! A young boy who listened to his mother when he got a bit carried away by the peanut paste samples! The seeds of altruism and selflessness planted in rich soil! It will never be too late, Danes, to install the Schackenborg line on the throne!
Article: Her og Nu
Prince Felix Drank Contaminated Water
Countess Alexandra is rightly proud of her curious and inquisitive son, Prince Felix, who unreservedly had a taste at a UNICEF event for children in need.
There were neither wrinkled noses or gagging sounds when 10-year-old Prince Felix bravely drank a glass of contaminated water cleaned with a water purification tablet.
In fact, his mother, Countess Alexandra, 48, was so impressed that she also grabbed a glass of muddy water and drank it.
"It actually tastes a lot like water", found the countess and triggered laughter in the tent at Nytorv in Copenhagen, where she worked as patron of UNICEF together with Prince Felix opened the photo exhibition UNICEF Children's Fight For Survival.
And it's not just Prince Felix who is happy to accompany his mother to work.
"Prince Nikolai would have helped here, but he will be sadly later finished school today.
He could have skipped the last hour, but that wouldn't go", said Countess Alexandra.
The very beautiful and poignant photos taken by award-winning photographer Jan Grarup who has traveled the Central African Republic in Africa with UNICEF. The exhibition also gives examples of other tools which UNICEF uses outside in disaster areas, and while the adults drank coffee and ate cookies, Prince Felix was ready to taste one of the emergency rations with a bold peanut paste, which can keep starving children alive
"It tastes good", Prince Felix smiled and took a long spoonful of peanut paste.
And after eating almost an entire portion, mother Alexandra admonished Felix to let the rest lie and instead grab a cup of hot cocoa.
As patron of UNICEF, Countess Alexandra has traveled to developing countries, and she hopes that she can inspire her sons to do the same.
"I will not force them into something they should even feel like it. But we talk about it at home, and charity should start at home", told Countess Alexandra, when she and Prince Felix had seen the exhibition.

Photos: Bo Nymann

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

At the Christmas Seals Launch, Count Ingolf and Countess Sussie Suffer The Indignity of Sharing A Stage With the 'Marketing Genius' Who Prefers to Ignore Them

Poor Ingolf and Sussie. Not only was this poor man denied the throne of Denmark by MoreMore's husband's MorMor (a bullet he may well be grateful he dodged), but now he and his wife have to suffer through their longtime patronage - the Christmas Seals - with the new 'marquee' patron, Princess Yrma Vep of Boganborg. Hasn't this couple suffered enough!? They were completely and totally ignored by Madam at the christening of lille prins Henrik in 2009 (you can see in the video at around 2:48 that Derf greets the couple, but Mary doesn't, and neither makes any simile of an effort to have their own children acknowledge their elder cousins). God, Mary has such ugly manners. And look at her body language in the photie above, with her shoulder in front of poor Ingolf. My goodness those two are gracious in the face of bogan narcissism!

MoreMore meanwhile continues to not help this worthy patronage get back on its feet in terms of financial help or publicity. As previously noted, they are losing money. So much for our Australian marketing genius! If Yrma had any sense of noblesse oblige, she could give them loads of free publicity and have her own marketing gurus (ha!) help them out. The goal of the Christmas Seals organisation is to fund homes for overweight children. I guess Madam La Comtesse de Taroona doesn't think fat people are worth her time. Only an annual photo op and a go on the trampoline for the Christmas Seals.

Video: TV Syd

"Alright, just gimme the flowers already, it's not like I'm here for yoouuu!"

"Who else thought she'd be this tall? She's a shrimp!"

"Kind of loony looking, too, eh?"

"Shut up, artist person, while the cameras drink in The Mary Show!"

"I was the one who told Madeleine to make a teehee sound at the end of her engagement video! People think it's SEXY."

Sad that the artist and not the crown princess is the one genuinely smiling and hugging the kiddos.

"Freebies!!!!! For ME!!!!"

"Are you getting my best angle? Is the flash on? Angle the camera up so my chin comes out thinner."

"Mary, why is your hair two different colours?"
"No you di'n! Bitch, please."

"Haha, ok, move along now, I have photies to take!"

Monday, October 29, 2012

BOO!: Crown Princess Yrma Vep Says Happy Halloween at a Gala for Danish Lung Association

"Like my sun damaged chestal skin? SEXY, eh mate?"

Halloween has come early to Copenhagen! Princess Scary Mary Boganson dressed up in a very scary costume last night. She dressed up as an eldery lady at the old pensioners' home's tribute to Elizabeth Taylor in Butterfield 8 (the character who was a troubled party/call girl in the ritzy zones of NYC). How appropos! And what a kindness! Trying to either scare the cancer away or to scare people with cancer to death to alleviate their pain. So thoughtful!

Among the performers at the event were Fred's friend Ellen Hillingsø and Mary's evil hairdresser Søren Hedegaard's partner Preben Kristensen.

Time to put away the Medusa hair extensions, bare arms and quite clamy and unsexy décolletage, Mary! You are too old and too ugly to try these tricks. Put on long sleeves and loads of bling because you have entered your dowager gold-digger phase. You may not weigh much on the scale, but your Duchess of Windsor-Countess of Romanones-Baby Jane era has commenced and you are going to scare the commoners even more than you already do, either behind the wheel of your oversized vehicle or with your wonky eyes and manic smiles. If you're going to suck the tax payers of Denmark dry, Mary, try doing it more respectfully and not by ruining their vision or their appetites!

Photo Gallery: Dagbladet Ringskjern

Ellen Hillingsø

Caroline Henderson & Preben Kristensen

Photos: Torkil Adsersen

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Slovakia State Visit, Day Two: MEMEMEMEME: Madam Notes How The Press Notes Derf's Attraction to Helle And Raises Her A "Happy, Delightful" Mood. Joachim and Marie Sense Trouble And Take Off Early To Attend James Bond Premiere of Skyfall.

"Hahahahaha. I care more than this old chick!"

Yrma La Douche is such an ugly piece of work. Here, the First Lady of Slovakia is in town on a state visit and Madam can't help but need to put herself upfront and centre, positioning herself smack between Mrs. Silvia Gašparovičovás and everyone the poor lady is supposed to be meeting. The First Lady is supposed to be learning from these specially chosen visits to Danish organisations and able to ask questions and meet people first hand so that she can take information and new ideas back to her home country for possible implementation within Slovakian society. But nooooooooo. MoreMore has to have her own way. She must still be smarting from going to the set of The Killing with the Duchess of Cornwall and watching dear Camilla being given a jumper just like that of the show's star, while Yrma Vep sucks the life out of such a generous moment with a visitor by pouting until someone threw a down "crime scene" coat at her (which she still found undesirable!). Mary Donaldson is so unroyal.

In the evening, the entire royal family was present at the Tivoli restaurant where the Slovakians offered a return dinner. Yrma was in a new dress, naturally. Reading the mood of the evening, Marie and Joachim arranged to go out later to the new James Bond film premiere, Skyfall. Joachim wore the same jacket he wore to his pre-wedding party in 2008 and Marie wore the dress from the pre-wedding party in Monaco last summer. Good idea to have a backup plan so as not to spend anymore time with their sister-in-law than necessary! Freddles, where is YOUR Plan B!?

Photo Gallery: BT


Photos: Torkil Adsersen, Hanne Juul/Billed-Bladet, Martin Sylvest Andersen

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Slovakia State Visit, Day One: Snore. Slovakia's In Town And It's All Just a Snooze Fest. Until Helle Arrives To Revive Freddles!

"Oh, Frede, we have all sorts of options for shipping her back to Oz, just ask!"

Things were moving along at the usual boring pace for this state visit from Slovakia. The arrival under gray skies, with greetings from gray royals and the formality of their entrance at Fredensborg Slot that the whole Danish nation seemed to completely ignore. Blah blah. Yadda yadda. This is my son Joachim, my sister Benedikte. Yeah yeah. And then this! (Cue "Lady in Red".)

Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt arrived at the castle in satin red, modestly covered except for a hint of womanly decolletage. Thank the stars for Helle! OK, so she's a little down in the polls, something something income tax audit something broken promises something something. Never mind! She is the key tonight for unlocking the fondly remembered but nearly forgotten warm, engaged, friendly, good-humoured, and open personality of one Crown Prince Frederik. Oh, the tsunami of warm, gooey, loin-centric feelings that must have overwhelmed the little boy once endeared to the Danes as Our Frede! He's not looked this good since, hm, well, the summer of 2000 after his triumphant dog sled tour of Greenland with the Sirius project and before he headed down to Sydney in September to have a head on collision with a multi-tentacled bogan arriviste of epic greedy proportions. He's been shrinking in size by the day since then!

In fact, just a few days prior in Luxembourg, this little tiny man-child thinggie was dressed in his daddy's Napoleon dress-up suit complete with tricorn hat and scawy sword (rarrrr!), being dragged around by a tranny ruler dominatrix in lady's clothing. He had nothing of a future head of state! Those two crazy kids: Halloween isn't until next week! But look at him now. Look at how he leans into Helle! He is craving love and attention. Get him away from that thing dressed like Bette Davis in What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? and put him in the company of a smart, sassy, gorgeous, funny, engaging, curvy gem of womanliness who flatters him with attention, shares jokes and intimacies and the old boy comes alive as if he has just awoken from a coma. Mind you, Helle isn't the only one with such powers. Darling sister-in-law Marie can do the same, although she is often seated away from Derfie and also knows from her husband how dangerous proximity can be. Danes: get a taste of what the future could be if your crown prince could be unleashed!

Photo Gallery: BT

Video: TV2


Photos: Keld Navntoft

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

The Inevitable: Princess Mary Donaldson Hits Bicyclist With Land Rover. Xian & Izzy Witnesses To Their Mother's Recklessness

This was bound to happen sooner or later. The disgusting entitlement and disregard for others with which Yrma and Derf move through their lives both physically and emotionally have finally reaped rotten fruit where Madam La Comtesse de Luxury Vehicles is concerned. MoreMore hit a female cyclist in the streets of Copenhagen while driving around with Xian and Izzy in one of the family's freebie Land Rovers. First, the cyclist at least seems to be ok on initial inspection; she was able to continue on her way after talking to Mary. It is a relief that it wasn't a harder hit, but that woman should still get medical attention because what you can't see is often worse and doesn't show up until later. Unlike Mary does routinely, this woman was fortunately wearing a bike helmet. But the woman should still report this accident to the police! Build up documentation against these privileged jerks.

Mary has been caught speeding through the streets of Copenhagen (and Australia) before, including a couple of times - once through a school zone - after her wedding in 2004 and in 2005. She's also feigned dumbness when confronted with parking issues. She is damned lucky but damned irresponsible as a driver. She married into the royal family which is above the law and cannot be sued, but I hope this episode leaves Mary shaking about her conduct behind the wheel. As a mother, as a princess in a nation that pays all of her bills, she needs to have more respect for the rules of the road. The Danish royals are known for their reckless speeding. Her husband has been dodging angels of death behind the wheels of his freebie cars all of his adult life, the latest incident in 2008 around the time of his brother's wedding near Graasten, and starting with a horrible accident in France with his brother and a couple of their friends that left Daisy so furious she dragged the two brothers to a press conference where she publically denounced their behaviour.

We can only imagine the horrible, cringe-worthy conversation Mary had with this poor woman she had just hit with her car. Mary probably speaking in a very high, childlike voice so that she would come across as vulnerable herself, seeking sympathy and trying to stave off nasty PR and getting the woman to not report the accident. Totally against all legal wisdom. Lene Balleby, court PR flunkie, further exasperates the situation by blaming the car for having blind spots. Fucking what!?! EVERY CAR HAS BLIND SPOTS!!! Besides, if you know your car isn't particularly safe, don't f*cking accept freebies that aren't safe! No one who sits above the law (something that should be changed!) should ever have so many other privileges bestowed on them as in the form of a passive-agressive public relations chief who cannot express sympathy with the cyclist and instead rattles on about the court paying for damages, which out of Lene's voice sounds more like a case of trying to buy off the cyclist so that she won't sue or make a stink that tumbles out of control. The worst part of the whole affair - provided the cyclist is physically ok - is that Izzy and Xian witness their parents again talking their way out of tight spots. HORRIBLE lesson for these privileged wards of the state and neither parent will address the imbalance in their young lives and the responsibilities that go hand in hand with their very comfortable existence. Let's hope the nannies are able to counter-act some of the negative influences that Mary Donaldson and Crown Prince Frederik are unable to address themselves.

Article: BT

Crown Princess Mary In a Right-Turn Accident: Drove Into Female Cyclist

A female cyclist was involved on Monday afternoon in two major scares. Around 4:40pm she collided with a large SUV that suddenly turned in front of her on the bike path, and perhaps an even bigger shock was when she realised who the driver of the car was.


Behind the wheel sat Crown Princess Mary, who in an unguarded moment had hit the cyclist. The accident happened when the Crown Princess swung her brown Land Rover down Slagelse Street from Østerbrogade in CopenhagenA craftsman who works in the building right next to the scene, saw how the two collided.

"She swung to the right and the cyclist was a little in her own world, and then they came together. They were both shocked, and I think the lady on the bike got an extra shock when she discovered who she was facing", he told BT.

Despite the unfortunate circumstances that found these two women quickly pitched togetheraccording to witnesses on the ground, they soon began to stand and chuckle together.

Princess Mary was apparently particularly amused that the cyclist offered to send a text message.

After Crown Princess' car drove off, as usual a black car with bodyguards from the Secret Service, PET, followed, but here they do not want to mention the episode.

"We give our opinion never in cases where we are bodyguards for specific people", says the PET.

The accident, fortunately not very serious, was not reported to the police.


Monday, October 22, 2012

Wedding in Luxembourg: Derf Takes an Alien Jezebel With a Head Goiter to the Gala Dinner and Jane Stephens To the Wedding

"You realise you could just man up and kick her out if you really wanted to, don't you?"

At first glance, Yrma seems ready to try to position herself just as Kate Middleton's Better. Fair amount of brass for someone with a swampier background than the decidedly monied middle class future queen of the UK. Madam does not disappoint at grand occasions where she is the clear outlier of the royal mob! For someone who does not speak more than two languages (and arguably not either one very well!), it was a hoot to see La Comtesse de Sandy Bay trying to sing along in French during the ceremony. MoreMore is always off her game (her game being triumphant self-promotion in the Danish sugar press) when she is surrounded by multi-lingual, sophisticated, educated, worldly royals and nobles. But dressing her manly figure in a boring, peplumed burgundy suit and extra heavy felt hat as if she were a 50s housewife heading into town for lunch and shopping felt very Kate-like at the detriment of Yrma's tranny, stick-straight figure.

However, on closer inspection, this wedding may be a turning point in MoreMore's style evolution. With deep wrinkles, wonky eyes, manly figure, pursed lips, no fashion sense, and special brand of stupid, it seems that she has finally conceded that she cannot compete with Maxima's inherent chic, Mathilde's sweet grace, Stéphanie's integrity, Letizia's intelligence or even Mette-Marit's conjugal bliss and so she is playing the Aged Dowager Matron card. Just throw 'em totally off their game. If she can't play as a young, vibrant, sexy, chic, smart, cultured, modern woman, the own the dowdy, doddering old bat with a dashing past life. Mary as Aline, the Countess of Romanones! The nutty relative who thinks she was born to a better station and always shows up in over the top but unstylish clothing, over the top jools and hair that seems to be hiding an American football in its nest (if not also a few of Ingrid's rubies). Will it work or is it a one time thing? She doesn't have the requisite kindness of that dottering old rello, nor does she have an ounce of wisdom. Derf just looks minimal and insignificant in her presence. If the effect was to just diminish him, checkmate. But in fairness, she's been working on that for more than 12 years now.

Poor Guillaume to have to have put up with Crazy Cousins Derf and Yrma who was such a rude bitch to the lovely-mannered Luxembourg heir back in 2009 at the Silver Wedding celebrations for Grand Duke Henri and his wife Maria Teresa. Why don't you learn French, Mares, so you won't actually be left out of the conversation instead of getting mad at your husband and friend for speaking in their common language. Very smart of Guillaume to make sure that Madam and her little husband were diverted in their limo from the airport so as not to make such a screaming scene on the red carpet for the gala. Madam in her full-on, too-tight jezebel gown and ostentatious jools isn't quite comme il faut in conservative, Catholic Luxembourg (red is the sign of the devil), but it does live up to the Duchess of Windsor's mantra that you can never be too rich or too thin. Poor Count Christian de Lannoy, Yrma's table partner and brother to the bride; he is doing a hero's job of keeping a poker face confronted with such a strange site. And for Guillaume and Stephanie to have one of the castle ladies-in-waiting pin Madam's neckline together on her way to church so as not to show as much sternum-décolletage was a smart and sensible move. One has to be resourceful when one is required to invite one's weird Danish cousin and his very scary wife.

Video (full ceremony): RTL

Photo Gallery: BT

Article, Photos and Videos: Daily Mail



Photos: Cour Grand Ducale Vic Fischbach/Christian Aschman, Reuters/Scanpix