Derf & Yrma to Norway to Celebrate Haakon's 40th Birthday: Why Do They Bother? They Only Get Shown Up By Haakon and Mette-Marit's True Love and Well-Behaved, Pretty Children

Danish sourpuss arriving!

 

 

Why do these two even bother to show up at these parties where the quasi-jet set and very gorgeous Norwegian people will be in abundance? OK, we know Freddles and Haakon are united in their Scandinavian crown princely status, and Haakon at least has made kindly overtures of friendship toward Derfie as in asking him to be his Best Man, and in trying to save him from drugs and Mary on Arctic detox adventures with Victoria. Plus, Frex loves a party and heard there would be a lot of blondes in attendance. What's Mary's motivation? Thinking that this is another chance to make the Daily Mail's website? To be a thorn in Fred's side? She's not in Mette-Marit's girls club with Marie-Chantal, Rosario de Bulgaria and Gwynnie Paltrow. Mary's friends include formerly poor and middle class holograms like Baroness Helle Reedtz-Thott who hosted the clown prince couple recently for a ballet performance at her Gavnø Castle. What a drag for all the guests to have this Danish sourpuss show up and expect to be entertained, then retreat to the corner to pout alone when no one will talk to her. Sigh. It's so hard being Mary.

 

 

 

Plus, Madam must be really taken back by the authentic and spontaneous displays of love and affection showed by Haakon and Mette-Marit. This ain't faked! That love clearly extends to their children, including the very tall and handsome Marius, who seem calm and non-anxious. And how adorable is Ingrid Alexandra who gave an impressive and cute speech to kick off Haakon Fest 2013. At the end, she says a line in English that is well-pronounced and accented in such a way that proves that she's knowledgeable in English. Telling that Xian and Izzy weren't invited; guess they're all not actually so close at all.

 

Can't fake this. Get a room, you crazy kids!

Video of Ingrid Alexandra's bilingual speech: VG

Also a highlight of Haakon's 40th birthday is a film that was released today. Haakon is interviewed by a Norwegian journalist about his age, and they talk on the front steps of the palace, they travel to Haakon's military barracks, and to California where Haakon goes surfing in Santa Cruz, gets stopped by a cop for speeding, and has trouble finding the house he lived in while at Berkeley. They also interview Victoria and Frederik. As Scandinavians do, everyone spoke their own language and they all understood each other. Except you wonder if the Norwegian interviewer understood Frederik at all. Our boy isn't the most articulate person in Denmark and Danes sometimes have trouble understanding him! Toward the end is wonderful footage of the king, Haakon and Ingrid Alexandra touring the official rooms at the royal palace and the older men talking to the young girl about their family business. (Although bright and articulate, someone needs to get IA into ballet and/or comportment classes, that inverted duck walk does nothing for her appeal.)

Video of Haakon's 40th birthday film "On the Road to a Reign": NRK

Derf on the far right

You can tell it's Fred from the French flag on the sleeve...

 

...and the hand that's about to go down his pants

 

Martha Louise, her youngest daughter and Constantijn on the far right

 

Cute play between Constantijn and ML's little one

 

Uncle Constantijn clearly has a nice relationship with ML from her Netherlands days

 

 

King Harald and Willem Alexander

 

 

Prince Jaime of Bourbon-Parma

 

 

Sisters in law who really like each other!

 

 

Hurry Fred! Shows starting!

 

Gotta get away from Madam (far left)

 

And find that blonde!

ML made a very loving and emotional speech for her brother

 

 

FASCINATING segment as Fred and Mary come toward the stage from separate directions, Mary chomping on food or cleaning her teeth with her tongue. No wonder Fred's done with Mary - she is seriously mentally ill, going between looking for cameras, and using her social Tourette's. What an embarrassment. No wonder Maxima was standing half a mile away!

 

 

Mary and her jowls enter from the right, while Fred notices the blonde with a bare shoulder

 

 

Mary's approaching, but Fred is oblivious to all but Miss Blondine

 

 

Mary makes her move toward a smiling Fred engaged with pretty blondes

 

Fred notices the circling shark, his smile disappears

Mary looks back to the cameras, Fred seems to plead with MM to help

 

Fred moves very far over to the right

 

Mary catches up to him and bizarrely wraps him in a blanket

 

Fred manages to fling off the blanket and stay calm to diffuse his strange wife.

 

 

No wonder Maxima decided to stand so far away from the Danes!

 

 

"I'll find Maxima. If Fred won't talk to me, I'll make her!" 

 

This is a family.

Photos: NRK

Go Girl: Trine Dishes It To Daisy: You're Out Sick More Than You Work: Rule or Abdicate, Sister!

 

Hot on the heels of the publication of her husband Malcolm Brabant's fantastic new ebook, "Malcolm Is A Little Unwell", Trine Villemann uses her platform as an op-ed contributor to Politiken to shine the spotlight on the fact that Queen Margrethe has an unhelpful approach to being a queen (sticking on until kicking it), in light of the fact that Beatrix and Albert in the Benelux are stepping down at reasonable ages to allow for the work of the Head of State to continue in the hands of capable people.

Oh, yeah! That's why Daisy doesn't step down - Derfie would become king in name only, and MoreMore would become queen and regent. What kind of "medication" is the Derf Man on? Jiminy. You Danes thought Christian IV was bad, wait til the Treasury is sucked dry with a pipe that goes all the way down to an ALERKA account in Oz because your king is off in Miami "losing his wedding ring" while "sailing". Gud Bevare Danmark!

Article: Politiken

Parliament Should Send Margrethe on Sick Leave

A few months ago, Holland's 75-year-old Queen Beatrix threw in the towel in recognition of the fact that the forces are no longer struck.

In a few days it will be Belgium's 79-year-old King Albert's turn to do the same.

While our own 73-year-old Margrethe sits so convulsively on the throne, that one could be forgiven for thinking that rigor mortis has already begun.

Nothing can wrest Denmark's Queen Margrethe from her belief that she has been assigned a mission from God, and that it can no earthly creature could take from her.

But you could try.

The Truth About Her Majesty Queen Margrethe II of Denmark is namely that she is too sick to go to work.

Amalienborg nowadays falls over themselves to hide that the queen is so pained by arthritis that it is now impossible for her to carry out her official duties.

The Queen's aides, for example, are usually nothing more than an expensive, prehistoric relics, but recently the proud officers in the well pressed uniforms got something useful to do.

The duty adjutant discreetly holds a folding chair when Queen inaugurates exhibitions, award prizes, rocks cords above and so on, so that the Queen can instantly sit down when the pain becomes too severe.

It is a measure that has been introduced after on several occasions it was realised that the queen's consumption of painkillers had reached a point where it was difficult for the monarch to stay awake during the many long talks a head of state is involuntarily committed to tolerate.

Now Amalienborg has turned down the medicine and up to a folding chair in the hope that there is a balance between the two measures that makes the Queen perform her duties without falling asleep and without being cobbled together by pain.

Nothing that I have described is new to the journalists who follow the queen. You just choose not to write about it for fear of getting at Amalienborg an unofficial list of media people whose requests one takes a really long time to answer.

But even court approved Billed-Bladet has realised that the queen's failing health can no longer be glossed over. Recently, they even brought you a photo of the Queen's adjutant, who stood ready behind the ruler with the folding chair behind his back.

And the concern for what the Queen's actual powers are extend far into both the circle of friends and staff. Believe me, it's not just magazines that have noticed that it is difficult for the queen to follow suit. Usually, the Queen's health problems are fairly closed off to my sources, but I have spoken to both staff at the court and longstanding friends who all confirm that the arthritis has made the Queen incapacitated.

It is obviously bad for the Queen, to have arthritis so mercilessly ravaging her body. And it is a shame for her that we in Denmark do not have a tradition of sending our monarchs off to retire when they reach their sell-by date, but it is also a shame for us Danes that we are burdened with a head of state who refuse to see the facts.

What other business in Denmark - private or public - can get away with having a leader who eventually can not stand or walk without taking very strong medication? And as several times for health reasons has canceled the important state visit that is said to benefit exports because our illustrious head is to smile and bow?

The Queen has previously stated that she would not dream of turning her back on her fate, but that she would abdicate if her mental faculties failed.

My question is how much pain medication a queen can take before than the very same mental faculties are no longer intact. Understand a heavily pain soothed the queen, for example, always the laws presented her signature?And who decides that? Queen herself? Her doctors? The Prime Minister?Whether the Queen likes it or not, it's time at least she take some sick leave.

In Norway, sick King Harald with great success in 2005 when he underwent extensive heart surgery. In a few months, Crown Prince Haakon was the King's regent, while Harald came to recuperate after a bypass surgery with its attendant complications.

Here in Denmark, we can also send her majesty on sick leave without the big state legal drama.

Constitution Section 9 states namely solid that "provisions relating to the exercising in the case of the king's minority, illness or absence established by law".And no matter how much Amalienborg tries to embellish reality, there is no doubt that the Queen is sick.

Therefore, a majority in parliament by law can send Margrethe on sick leave by depriving her Majesty half of the legislature and such transfer it to Crown Prince Frederik.

The queen can of course refuse to sign this law, but we are in a serious democratic crisis.

Parliamentary sick leave for our head of state can naturally be limited in time, such as any sick leave for any other Dane also has it, but the law should also contain a clause that if it is not deemed medically and constitutionally proper that the queen returns to her work, then she must abdicate.

For the benefit of themselves. And for the benefit of Denmark.

I know it's blasphemous talk to mention the word 'abdication' at Amalienborg, but for us taxpayers who annually put in the neighbourhood of a half billion kroner to maintain the institution of the monarchy, it is surely not too much to ask to get a head of this institution who is physically and mentally able to perform her obligations.

And the kingdom's vocal republican minority does not hoist the flag. A poll recently showed that support for the Danish royal family is the highest in 10 years.

The popularity is with the guarantee of nothing less than Margrethe crawling into bed and letting our photogenic crown prince couple take over - at least for a while. On the contrary.

Those of us who still cherish a rather unhappy dream about the Danish monarchy will one day wake up from our Sleeping Beauty-sleep with a royal family that is always strongest with young, enterprising people in the residence of the royal chambers.

If our elected officials really want to help the royals - and most politicians always do - they need to send Margrethe home to bed.

It's Official: The Derfsons Can't Stand Each Other, Fred Gets the Oldest Two, Mary Gets the Twins, and Friends Are Still Called Upon To Be the Family Glue

Airing out the ol' presque-zizi!

 

 

 

So Derf and Yrma grab the kids and their besties and a few nannies and perhaps even Mary's new lady's maid, and head up to the northern coast of Zealand to the chic resort town of Tisvilde. This is where Fred's friend Alexander Kølpin has a restaurant and hotel (Alexander was married to Rigmor Zobel's sister Sarah and has a son named Vincent). This is the town where over the years Caroline Heering has had a big birthday party, where the Derfsons have had previous beach holidays, including with Julie Mølsgaard, and where various members of their rich aristos set comes to party in the summer. Skagen is over; Tisvildeleje is where it's at. ("-leje" indicates the coast, like -port in English.)

 

NO photos of Fred and Mary together. At all. These two can't stand each other and they are doing their damnedest to stay together despite mutual resentment. Mary wants the money, fame and social prestige that Denmark gives her and Fred doesn't want trouble, and Mary is a convenient foil for his underground escapes and lack of work ethic. Every once in a while there's probably angry sex, then back to covert hostility or passive aggressiveness. What nasty pieces of work the twose of 'em are!

 

The kids seem to be evenly divvied up between the more easy-going Far, and Looker Me! MoreMore. Xian and Izzy seem to be handling life well now - a tribute to the discipline of school and the love of Fred's formerly blonde and buxom gaggle of nannies. The nannies! They used to be young, sexy, and hot. Now they're dowdy, plump and geriatric. Wow, does Mary know how to punish Freddles, or what?

 

Poor fat, single friend Julie Mølsgaard who puts up with this crap every year. She is Our Izzy's saving grace. Julie was on the luxury yacht in the Mediterranean owned by Scanomat boss Kim Vibe Petersen both times and has gone on holiday with the Dumblederfs other times in the past. What sort of grace and favours must Daisy be planning for her? A Dannebrog? A chambermaid status? An elephant!? She deserves something great for putting up with this crowd!

 

Joisuz, that water looks cold! Is Mary allowing Izzy to be fed? A little body fat could go a long way to keeping our girl better insulated.

 

 

Julie Mølsgaard is surely doing her duty to Denmark by making sure the heir and spare are properly loved and cared for by a female role model.

 

 

Seems on this day, Madam stayed at home and Fred and Julie took the kids to the beach.

Why are these children allowed to eat while walking around in public? Pull back on the cool dad bit, Derfo, you're royal.

 

A smile on Rat Face? Surely a crab found its way up her trap!

 

"I said, where is my beach towel, JULIE? Chop chop!"

 

Not Fred helping Madam out of the low tide? How graceless and un-sporty, Mary!

 

Sourpuss alert! Look at how tense Mary's making Julie Mølsgaard! Crickey!

 

"The Little Mermaid"! As if! Unless "mermaid" here has its original meaning as a walrus viewed through rum goggles who symbolises perilous events and ship(s of state) wrecks!

Eating in public is unroyal and a nasty bogan habit. And, yes, Mary, by your smile we know you called the paps.

 

Goodness, the nannies keep getting fatter and plainer! Poor Fred!

 

FAIL.

 

This is one of Mary's trademark looker me bum "sexy" poses.

 

 

 

Source: Her og Nu

 

 

 

Derf and Yrma to Mexico, November 2013: POOR, BROWN PEOPLE! Score!

Pack the Nikon, Fred, we're hitting a third world country!

Mary: "Fred, wake up, dumbshit! This is going to be as fun as going to a zoo! And someone else picks up the tab! And I get more photies for my upcoming coffee table book and gallery vernissage! Even if Tanja said that I have to give the profits over to some charity. Ha! Whadya think I put The Mary Fund together for? SNAP."

Fred: "Tequila. Nuf said."


Official Website: Royal Visit Mexico 2013

 

 

Queen Daisy Ozymandias To Clown Princess Yrma: Look Upon My Works, Ye Bogan, And Despair!: I'm Having Them Bury Me In a 29 Million Kroner Glass Doobie With Your Beloved Rubies: Toodles!

I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: "Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown
And wrinkled lip and sneer of cold command
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
`My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings:
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!'
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away".

- Percy Bysshe Shelley

Ozymandias, 1818

Good luck, Denmark!