Brazil Day Five: Yrma Sees Kate Middleton On Bare Breasts And Raises Her Wearing Pajamas In Public: Top That, Kate! Oh, My Husband's Bored By Me, Too!

Wonky eyes twitch as badly as left ankles when Madam is uncomfortable

Getting back to her bogan roots by walking around a sophisticated, major world city in her jammies, Madam contemplated how it is too bad that Louboutin doesn't make red-soled fuzzy slippers. Tant pis! Anyhoos, Madam did look like a rich old batty lady (more than normal!) with less sense than kroner visiting the Human Milk Bank in Rio with a lovely, busty "Fredesque" Brazilian actress as her guide. My, those south Americans are touchy! But if standing around surrounded by nipples is what MoreMore needs to do to one-up Kate Middleton, so be it. And Kate didn't do it in a clown-collared, paisley jumpsuit. Madam raises you, Kate! With a ridiculously oversized and overly bright magenta purse/suitcase. Take that! Proof in case you needed it that Anja doesn't know what in the hell she's doing and that Princess Mary Donaldson is a total fashion victim.

More fun comes during the We Are So In Love, DAMMIT! photo session along Copacabana beach, outside of the hotel they're staying in, the Windsor Atlantique, after a visit to the Rio 2016 IOC folks. A quick obligation to the Danish photographers, a little red meat for MoreMore, a little torture for Derfie. He can't stand her. Their body language gives away that they have no connection, no real relationship besides being united in their grifting of the Danish state and taxpayers with their insatiable desire for freebies. They walk down the sidewalk very distant from each other, then walk back toward the cameras holding hands as if each thinks the other has scabbies!

According to the Clown Princely Couple's agenda, they were finished with their official duties by early afternoon with a 7pm dinner the only other item for the day. Presumably, this was slush built into the schedule to accommodate Derf's pub crawls and Madam's need to exercise, fluff the Kate Middleton wig or push out a bowel movement. However, cousin Ragnhild of Norway's funeral was held at the Anglican Church, just up the hill from Copacabana. Ragnhild's best friend was Dead Countess Ruth (whose funeral buffet Jock and the Dumpling crashed and which was held on the very day Mares announced the Miracle Twins' birth) and she herself was the daughter of a former prince of Denmark, hence the close cousin-ship between Daisy and the Norways. How fortuitous that Derf and Yrma's visit to Brazil corresponded with this memorial service before Ragnhild's body was flown back to Oslo. But did our dud duo bother to show up and pay respects? Oh, hell no. What, you thought they were thoughtful and considerate? Mary went shopping in a cheap, nameless gift store to load up on cheap flip-flops, heady for her K-Mart days. Besides, Madam doesn't spend much on the gargoyles, Jane and Patty for Chrissie. They will love what they are given because Auntie Mary got them on a free trip to an exotic country: flip-flops in the colours of the Brazilian carnaval. Also, Mary feels the need to train Izzy not to expect nice things in life. Once a bogan, always a bogan.

Photo Gallery: BT

Photo Gallery: Isopix

 

 

 

 

"Getta loada this, Kate Middleton: better hair, plenty of boobs and no need for lawsuits. Your serve."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Photos: Keld Navntoft/Scanpix 2012

Yrma Gives Vickan Half-Hearted Congratties; Other Scandi Royals Are More Sincere

No word on whether the bouquet Mary sent to Victoria (referenced in this article) had been plucked half-dead from a vase on Mary's desk, a treatment Princess Marie knows all too well.

Press Release: Danish Royal Court

Article: Jyllands Posten with video of Daniel's morning press conference.

Frederik and Mary have congratulated Victoria

The Danish royal family want the Swedish Crown Princess Couple to be congratulated on their newborn girl. Flowers should be on when a new baby comes into the world.

Therefore, Crown Prince Frederik and Crown Princess Mary sent a bouquet to the Swedish Crown Princess Victoria and Prince Daniel, who on Thursday morning were the parents of a fit baby girl.

"The Royal Couple have also expressed their joy, and sent flowers to Their Royal Highnesses Crown Princess Victoria and Prince Daniel," writes the Danish court in a press release entitled "Happy Princess".

Queen Margrethe also welcomes the fact that her cousin, King Carl Gustaf, for the first time can call himself a grandfather.

She has followed court tradition and sent "congratulatory telegrams" to the Swedish royal couple and to the new parents.

Also the Norwegian royal family sent warm greetings from the palace in Oslo to Sweden.

"The royal family has sent congratulations to the new parents and the Swedish royal couple for the birth this morning," says deputy communications director Sven Gj. Gjeruldsen to the Norwegian news agency NTB.

While the newborn girl at 3,280 grams and 51 centimeters is the first grandchild - and thus heir to the throne - in Sweden, so is the Danish royal family and Queen Margrethe enriched with as many as eight grandchildren.

In Norway there is also a large brood of children among the royals. There are five children in the third generation of the royal family - and something as modern as a bonus-grandchild.

Margrethe 40: Church Service at Christiansborg

Sunday, 15 January. Held in the same church in which Christian was baptised, a commemorative service was held to honour Daisy for 40 years of reign. Yrma continued to bring blessings to the assembled peasants (poor Haakon and Mette-Marit, averting their eyes in embarrassment, no wonder they only arrived for a day's worth of activities). She and Derf only brought the oldest two children since they alone were hard enough to handle. Why can't these two be bothered to parent their children properly!? Joachim so clearly parents his boys beautiful; Nikolai's hyperactivity is no doubt due to him being less than a year away from becoming a teenager. Poor Izzy is just not dressed in a way that is dignified for her position. Why not a cute, flannel smocked dress with little Mary Jane shoes instead of the too-tight, kindergarten-worthy playground booties and purse? No elegance on Mary's part, and more proof that she and Marie-Chantal are not friends. At least Mette-Marit came to Izzy's rescue as they were all leaving church, by taking the attention-starved young girl by the hand while Mary kept on waving to the peasants.

Margrethe 40: Reception at City Hall in Copenhagen

Saturday, 14 January. After a carriage ride from Amalienborg down Strøget, the pedestrian shopping street that runs through the heart of Copenhagen, the Queen and Prince Henrik arrived at City Hall at Rådhuspladsen for a reception by the mayor in front of the entire family and visiting dignitaries including the Kings and Queens of Sweden and Norway as well as the Icelandic presidential couple and the top ministers of the Danish government including the very elegant Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt. Afterwards, there was a round of hurras from the people gathered to the queen on the balcony.