Showing posts with label Madeleine. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Madeleine. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Christening of Prinsessan Estelle: Yrma's Title Trumps Her Personality: Vickan Knows About the Coming Danish Republic

"Somebody please listen to me about that Mary creature!!"

Sweet little Princess Estelle was baptised today in the Royal Chapel in Stockholm. Depending on your read of the political structure in Sweden, the future queen or future gym empire heiress was sprinkled with water from Öland and joined the family of Christians in a noble ceremony that put the Danish heir's baptism to shame, style-wise. The Order of the Seraphim was bestowed on the little one, she was laid in an 18th century cradle next to the receiving line in a gown from 1906, and kept a skeptical look on her face during the entire service. She knows she got f*cked in the royal godmama department. She knows she's sharing breathing space with Unca Carl Philip's Snake Girl. She knows Unca Derfie hit on Auntie Madde, not recognising her with dark hair.

Yrma wore her flying saucer hat from Monaco that she bought to wear to Will and Kate's wedding, except that she didn't get an invitation; a gold Chanel quilted bag that signals her middle-age; a gold dress she wore on an official visit to Romania to get fresh gypsy wiglets; and a white coat from her large collection. She was fidgety, lost and wholly self-conscious as a high level guest with an actual role as spiritual advisor to this young princess. Madde looked elegant, pretty and happy; her dark hair is very flattering to her blue eyes and complexion and Mr. O'Neil is clearly flattering to her spirit. Maxima was true to her source and rocked a bright red suit and wonderful turban hat with some misguided stripper pumps. Sweet Mathilde looked great, too, in shimmery, dark neutrals.

Victoria must know that having Cousin Derf as a godparent would only lead to embarrassing waterworks and Daniel's discomfort knowing Fred's love for Victoria. She must also have a sense that asking the Crown Princess of Denmark instead of the future king signals the impending end to the Danish monarchy. Poor Mary. She thinks it's because she's a wonderful role model. Nah. Just favours to Daisy & Daniel and keeping Fred's tears from staining the baby's dress.

Video, Part 1: SVT

Video, Part 2: SVT

Official Photos: Kugahuset

Photo Gallery: BT

Photo Gallery: NWT









Princess Christina and husband Tord Magnusson



Princesses Margretha, Désirée and Birgitta



Hereditary Grand-Duke Guillaume and fiancée Stéphanie de Lannoy


Princess Mathilde and Prince Philippe

Yrma and Crown Prince Haakon who wisely wore sterile gloves in Madam's presence

Princess Maxima, Derf and Princess Madeleine





This is not a face that will age well









Photos: Henrik Montgomery

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Billed Bladet #26: To Graasten or Not To Graasten

So BB is definitely trying to play both to Team Daisy and to Team Mary by whitewashing whatever nonsense is going on in the palace corridors. First, there is the report that the Crown Prince and Crown Princess will not be reporting to Graasten this year for the annual summer holiday of the Danish royal family. But since the person who dropped that bomb was Trine Villemann who wrote the scathing book "1015 Copenhagen K" on the inner workings and machinations of the royals, you can bet that Mary will do her best to be in Graasten if only to prove Trine wrong. Ironic considering that Mary came out of Trine's book looking the best of the bunch! So, BB doesn't confirm Fred and Mary's presence, but does imply that the whole family will be together at Farmor Daisy's. Again, very funny since Graasten was given to Fred! Mary must be pretty mad and still resentful of the cold shoulder she got last year after announcing a twins pregnancy on the same day as Rosenborg cousin Countess Ruth's funeral.



Richard and Ingrid's expressions say it all - get me outta here!





Photos from over the most recent summers of the Graasten crew.





The week's fashion awards go to Princess Marie and The Duchess of Cambridge! Mary who?





Daisy continues to exercise her artistic talents by designing and watercolouring costumes for The Nutcracker for the Royal Danish Ballet. Is Mary's hobby of shopping going to be fulfilling enough to carry her into old age and earn her the respect of her countrymen and women? Mary has no culture. Even Fred has an artistic sensibility, being into design, art and theatre.





No Mary in the Royal Mailbag. No appearance in Style Finder or Bubbles, either. She's quite a bore, that Australian bogan.



Love the headline! "Mary: I'm a Simpleton". BB is very sly! Note how Mary's sheer shirt is poofing out of her trousers gap, exposing plumber's crack. (A dangerous thing, given how Mary's masculine build could lead to people confusing her with those who practice the manual labour arts.) Note how the Duchess of Cambridge manages never to allow this to happen, wearing clothing that won't broker such unattractive gaps.





Beautiful Frex Ex Katja Storkholm is still looking hot and sexy as she attended a young lady's confirmation party in a cute little black dress from Chanel and a funky jacket from the Spanish island of Mallorca. Very boho-aristocratic sartorial touches blending the high brow with the ethnic, and attending the party of a new Lutheran - how royal! Queen Ingrid is smiling from above.



Darling Princess Marie has passed the final exam for being a volunteer rescue worker! She had to scale down 5 floors of a building in pouring rain. That's quite a fearless feat! Way to go, Marie!



Princess Madeleine is still dating Chris O'Neill. They are, after all, the only two people in Manhattan who still smoke. Process of elimination, eh?





BB is gearing up for the successful North American tour of The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. BB's thirst needs quenching since Dumblederf and Morey Antoinette have failed to garner any attention during their visits to the US and Canada for the Olympics.





Billed Bladet never had much fun at all with the ugly Donaldson sisters and their roughly mannered, media-shy brother, so they are in seventh heaven telling you all about Britain's most eligible lady, Pippa Middleton, and how she's so self-assured and walking in her older sister's footsteps.





A terrific aerial view of Monaco with the key wedding locations highlighted. Mary and Fred stayed at the Hotel de Paris and the Friday night cocktail party for the royals was held at the Hermitage Hotel.



Sunday, February 20, 2011

Billed Bladet #6: Marie in the spotlight

BB seems to switch to Mary covers every few issues after heavy Marie coverage, just to keep Madam Mary off BB's French-perfumed scent. The editors of BB can't actually admit openly how much they prefer La Belle Marie - it doesn't help how much the Danish press waged a fierce campaign against her fellow countryman Henrik; oh, what the last 40 years have taught them! - so they have to be very subliminal and discrete. Fortunately, Mary's Asperger's keeps her in the dark on matters subtils! Also, Mary's ADHD keeps her focussed on just the status of the cover, therefore the editors planted a photie of Mary in chandelier earrings on this issue to get her off their scent. Never mind that she's staring at a point beyond a haggard Freddles (which is the closest they could get to her actually planting a gaze on him) and proclaiming her small birthday gathering a "Party at the Palace", implying disco lights, large crowds, a huge cake, and a loving husband and family close around her. Nada. A few glum Foffies (Friends of Fred) were snapped driving up to their home at Amalienborg with tense jaws and hopes that Madam has been sufficiently tranquilised so that the next few hours of pretending to care about her big day will be swallowed by Mary hook, line and sinker. "OR ELSE, HANDWERK!" as Madam might otherwise say, creeping open a wonky eye as her stupor wore off.



Nice contrast of the two Danish princesses. Option One, for the Danes' pleasure, is the Mediterranean olive-complected, multilingual Princess Marie, tinged by the aura of Gallic aristocracy, fully embracing the distinctly harsher weather patterns of her adopted country and enjoying a healthy promenade in the fresh, frigid air with her adoring husband and beautiful, already bilingual, baby. On the other hand, Option Two is the older model, a pale, war-painted princess, abandoning the unsuccessful "sporty" self-branding in favour of a new "mother icon" image, togged in mumsy, poly-blend clothing, exiting hospital with two underweight, turkey-baster lunch tickets and her underweight, featherless chicken of a husband, the once dashing and confident future king. Weigh your choice, carefully, Denmark!





Three carloads of friends pull up to the Amalienborg gates for Mary's party: Jeppe and Birgitte Handwerk, veterans of the 2009 Mediterranean bikini-gate/yachting holiday; Baron Otto and Hologram Helle, a brewer and shoe-in for godmummy to one of the twinsies; Peter and Caroline Heering, a life-long Foffie and his wife, the LIW and personal secretary to Madam; and Ellen Hillingsø, noted actress and life-long Foffie with her husband Christoffer Castenschiold. Judging by their expressions and looks of doom, the theme of the party must be "Ceausescu's Golden Years!" Oh, the quiet agony of the dining table of friends, all silent, staring into their soup while Crown Princess Mary gets up occasionally to pump and puke, as friends in her absence ask Fred with pleading expressions, how are you doing? As in, "DUDE. Seriously. Are you OK!?"



By contrast, Marie and Joachim - who were reportedly at Mary's party, too - decided a more festive evening was in order. BB took a different tack with the French birthday girl and her festive friends, not having to plant a photographer near the palace exit to capture their expressions - we know this crew has fun together! Along for good times were friends Oscar Davidsen Siesbye and his wife, LIW Britt; Agnete and Christian Scherfig; and Henriette and Peter Steenstrup. They all hit Danish star Remee's nightclub Zen for an intimate and fun evening of champagne and dancing.



As a little belated birthday pressie to Marie, BB awards her the royal dress of the week for the very elegant navy shift and fur shawl that she wore in Florence, Italy on an official visit. Very classic, madame! Grace Kelly and Babe Paley are smiling from heaven!





What a winning choice to send Princess Marie to one of the greatest birthplaces of European art and culture. She charmed her Florentine hosts at the European Universities Institute. During a friendly dinner at Giovanni restaurant in the evening, the large Dano-Italian delegation dined on antipasti, ham and mozzarella, goat cheese salad with eggplant, minestrone soup, handmade tortellini, steak with grilled artichokes and potatoes, with various cheeses and a warm orange cake with ice cream. Wise of Daisy to send the one Danish princess who does actually eat. That's the kind of spread that would have Crown Princess Mary excusing herself for the toilet at the end of each course! Must expunge salt and calories before the bogan frame explodes as if she were Mr. Creosote, mid-soup course!





On a visit to a new clinic in Middelfart, Marie continued to charm her hosts and all assembled. With a professional appearance, a warm smile, and a genuine interest in her surroundings and agenda, Marie was a welcome relief from the Kancellihuset Ice Cube who blows a cold wind over everyone except cameramen.



Marie takes Mary's place at the CIFF fashion shows. CIFF isn't something Mary has ever been able to get some positive, international exposure for, but this year, the Mary Court turned out in force at their traditional event, for the debut of the Better Danish Princess and her court (LIW Britt; Henrik godfather Christian and his wife, bridesmaid Agnete). Turf wars were ready to be waged by "stylist" Anja, LIW Caroline in harem pants (getting drunk and silly it seems with little sister Marie Louise Høm) and Foffie Ellen Hillingsø. Marie took it all in stride, greeting everyone warmly, and offering genuine affection to the grande dame of the runway shows, Malene Birger. And not one shot of madame making love to the camera!







Henrik: "Now the childproof locks are on again."
Nikolai & Felix: "This is our Elephant Order."
Marie: "Hic!" (The Danish sugar press NEVER makes fun of Mary. This is a real sign of affection for Marie that they can underscore her fearlessness in the face of caloric & alcoholic beverages! Nice roundabout way of sticking it to Mary 'I'll Just Have Water Please' Boganson.)



How delightful! Marie and Joachim will be travelling with the older boys to Greenland on a nice bonding trip that will see them enjoying dog sledding among other things. This trip will be a wonderful way to start teaching the boys about Denmark's responsibilities toward this wonderful but struggling nation as well as starting to talk to them about their poor uncle's legacy on the 2000 Sirius expedition and how after achieving a peak of masculinity there in Greenland, he subsequently left it all as a stain on the rough sheets of the share-house bed of one Miss Mary 'Succubus' Donaldson during the Olympics a few months later. "And that's why Unca Fweddie is always so tired and sad, boys." As an illustration of more mingling between the current Danish Crown Prince's court and the future Crown Princely family, aka Schackenborg, the wife of Fred's tennis partner friend and Izzy's godfather will be joining the young family.



Daisy just loves a good dictator! In an unbelievably tone deaf move, the Danish government sent their highest ranking ambassador, The Daisinator, and her husband on a state visit to the island nation of Bahrain, in the Persian Gulf, just one week before the king ordered his people killed as they protested in the streets for democracy. Hey, Danes! Would you, too, like to enjoy this medicine some call democracy? Here's what it will mean for you: a free press that doesn't force bile down your throats while dressing it in pink sugar and swearing that it is the greatest and most loving and supportive crown princess to Frederik you've ever had even though it's pretty obvious that your crown prince is desintegrating exponentially as the years - and the babies - add up. Never mind, says, BB! We'll just call the visit "An Oasis of Love" and pretend that they just caught the reigning couple on a walk in the park.









Princess Madeleine is keeping up her romance with NYC financier Chris O'Neill. This seems like a nice rebound relationship. They might even genuinely like each other! That will make it easier to break up whenever the time comes. Although, she'd be hard-pressed to find another man these days who smoke like she does! Chris, in turn, must be given credit for dating the curvaceous Madde after breaking up with skinny lingerie model Maryam Abdullina.